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August, 2004

20 Things I Think I Learned in College

After having moved my sister in to college this weekend I decided to write down some of the lessons I learned from four years at NYU. Some are kind of random, some are clichés and some are more advice than lessons. I probably could have gone beyond 20, but here they are:

1. Be careful, whatever you're doing: drinking, drugs, sex, etc. Just watch out and be smart.
2. Laugh at yourself, especially when you're drunk, nothing's that a big a deal that you need to get down on yourself about it. If you can't be an idiot when you're drunk, when can you be? And for all those people who recount your drunken charades in order to embarrass you . . . if they were having as good a time as you, they wouldn't remember what you did.
3. Be confident with who you are (it's a cliché, but it makes a big difference – it really is true that people can tell whether you or aren’t).
4. Don't do things you don't want to do. If you don't feel like hanging out with someone, just don't do it . . . it's really that simple.
5. Choose your friends carefully. Friends that you can trust, who will back you up no matter what, are the best kind. You can be less picky with acquaintances.
6. Never go out with a purpose of having a great time or meeting a girl/guy. Anytime you go into an evening with that much expectation it is almost sure to fail.
7. Talk to people . . . fuck them if they don't talk back.
8. Realize that there are going to be times when you feel kind of depressed for whatever reason, they'll pass. It happens to everyone.
9. Bros before hos (or hos before bros, whichever is appropriate). It’s never worth losing a good friend over someone of the opposite sex, no matter what they look like.
10. Eat before you drink and always have a good breakfast when you have a hangover, whether you feel like you should or not (the greasier the better -- and a cup of water, orange juice and coffee always helps the next morning).
11. Sometimes staying in for the evening is not the end of the world. I know you may feel like a loser, but when you really think about it, it's only one night of the year.
12. Try to stay away from tequila. It's the silent killer; it always sneaks into an evening and kicks your ass before you realize it's there.
13. Don't hit snooze too many times on your alarm, it's a really obnoxious move when you're living with other people.
14. Write all the numbers in your cell phone down somewhere, because the odds of you losing it sometime during four years of college are very good.
15. Find yourself some good wallowing music, for those days when you're feeling down.
16. When faced with a difficult decision, consider this: you’ll probably regret what you didn’t do, more than you regret what you did. (It’s kind of another cliché, but it’s a good point – why not just go for it now and worry about it later?)
17. If you’re really hammered, eat something and drink as much water as you possibly can before you go to sleep. You’ll feel much better in the morning.
18. Do a semester abroad because it’s really fun.
19. Take advantage of free stuff: free gym, free food, free time, etc.
20. Take pictures, you’ll appreciate having them later.

August 30, 2004
Noah Brier | Thanks for reading. | Don't fake the funk on a nasty dunk.