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February, 2005

The Official Birthday Party F.A.Q.

Lots of people have had lots of questions about this party, so I've decided to create the Noah's 2005 Birthday F.A.Q. (remember, I'm a dork). But for those of you who don't want to read the quite lengthy email, here are the quick details:

Location: Antarctica (http://www.antarcticabar.com)
Date: Saturday, February 26th (4 days after my real birthday)
Time: I'll be there at 9:30
Address: 287 Hudson Street (just below Spring)

Now, without any further ado, here are the answers to all your party questions:

Q: When is the party again?
A: It's this Saturday, Feburary 26. That's right, two days from now.

Q: What time is it going to start?
A: Well this one has been up in the air, so I haven't had a really good answer up to this point, but I do now. It's going to start at 9:30. That's right 9:30. Don't be late. I'll be there early if you want to get there early, though.

Q: What about being fashionably late? I don't want to be the first one there.
A: Fuck fashionably late. It's silly. I'll probably be there at 8:00, so you can pretty safely bet you won't be the first one there. So just get there on time, alright?

Q: Where is it?
A: Antarctica (http://www.antarcticabar.com). The bar is located at 287 Hudson Street (just below Spring).

Q: So how do I get there?
A: Easy. There are three ways. You could walk. You could take a cab. Or, you could take the subway. If you choose option three, here are the directions:

Take the C or E train to SPRING ST. Surface at Spring St. and 6th Ave. Walk two blocks west to Hudson St. (away from SOHO and towards the Hudson River).
Take the 1 or 9 train to HOUSTON ST. Surface at Houston and Varick St. Walk one block west to Hudson St., turn left, then 4 blocks south to Spring St.

Q: Is there food at this bar?
A: Nope, but we can bring it in. If people want to order pizzas, or anything else, we can do so.

Q: Why should I come?
A: It's my birthday party. But more importantly, you'll be able to drink a lot of booze for little money. It's going to be $20 all you can drink, starting right around 9:30. For those that are too lazy to do the math, that means from 9:30 - 11:30 you can drink anything but top shelf liquor without paying the bartender. After that you pay again, but if you're a liquor drinker you will be pleasantly surprised at the size of the mixed drinks at the bar (they're in pint glasses).

Q: When is your actual birthday?
A: It was Tuesday, February 22 and I turned 23.

Q: What kind of asshole writes an F.A.Q. for their birthday party?
A: This kind of asshole. The kind of asshole who keeps a website (https://www.noahbrier.com) and writes lots of boring stuff expecting people to read it.

Q: How will I know when the party's over?
A: If I walk out of the bar really angry for absolutely no good reason, my night is over. I guess if you do the same, that'll be a good sign.

Q: Is anyone else from Norwalk coming?
A: There seems to a small caravan coming, talk to Kim, I think she knows the lowdown.

Q: Why am I still reading this?
A: I'm not really sure. But there are still important questions to be answered.

Q: Can I bring friends?
A: Yeah, why not? Everyone is more than welcome.

Q: What kind of bar is it?
A: It's a dive bar. That means pool table and jukebox. No dress code. Even Dave can wear his sandals and get in.

Q: Can you tell me who I should consult about how to properly ridicule you for this email?
A: I would suggest Josh, he's quite good a ridiculing people and you can be sure he'll hate this email. In fact, he'll probably hate it much more now that I've written that. But you could also talk to Jeff, Dave and Lou, they'll all be more than happy to help you make fun of me about this, or anything else (especially https://www.noahbrier.com).

Q: How many times are you going to plug your website in this?
A: Three. Check out https://www.noahbrier.com

Q: Will you really go eat tacos at San Loco afterwards?
A: Nope.

Q: Will Lou?
A: Probably.

February 24, 2005
Noah Brier | Thanks for reading. | Don't fake the funk on a nasty dunk.